Graffiti

• Men are like vacations...They never seem to last long enough


• I believe in safe sex...I've got a handrail around the bed


• Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?


• I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight


• You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me


• All those who proclaim that dog is man's best friend, have evidently not played with a pussy.


• Civilized people need love for full sexual satisfaction


• Without a doubt, women are the foundation stone of the society; but always remember who laid them!


• Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin- it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring


• Success is like masturbation, only ur own hand can let u acheive it.


• You simply must stop taking other people's advice.


• Women aren't that bad, but wives...!


• Your lucky number is 6478389077163. Watch for it everywhere.


• If I wanted to hear from an ass, I would fart.


• Nobody ever goes there, it's too crowded.


• A good scare is worth more than good advice.


• Practice safe sex, go fuck yourself.


• Height of conceit : Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.


• My wife says my sex drive has taken up walking.


• 9 out of 10 men prefer large breasts. The other man prefers the 9 men.


• Cleavage is something you can look down on and approve of at the same time


• Money is jst like arse... everybody has it, but.... nobody wants to give it !


• Success is like masturbation, only ur own hand can let u acheive it.


• Educatuon is like hiring a prostitute, it needs both money & hard work.


• Work is like a gangbang, ten people are behind ur ass 2 take ur place.


• Fate is like getting raped, if u can't fight it learn to njoy it.


• I've never had premonitions, but I think one day I might.


• I'm a killer, I kill people for money, but you are my friend I KILL YOU FOR FREE !!


• We do precision guesswork.


• Automatic simply means that you can't repair it yourself.


• Most people like hard work. Particularly when they are paying for it.


• Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.


• Prejudice can save lots of time, because you can form an opinion without any facts.


• No sense being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway.


• Coffee, chocolate, men... some things are just better rich.


• Some people think they are generous coz they give away free advice


• The govt is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding govt.


• Youth is when you blame all your troubles on your parents; maturity is when you learn that everything is the fault of the younger generation.


• Political language is designed to make lies sound useful and murder respectable.


• The trouble with being the boss is that there's no satisfaction in stealing office supplies.


• I just got the bill for my surgery. Now I know why those doctors were wearing masks.


• Research is an organized method for keeping you reasonably dissatisfied with what you have.


• Almost every man wastes part of his life attempting to display qualities which he does not possess


• If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.


• I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.


• Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties.


• Don't lie, cheat or steal...unnecessarily.